osmie: (Default)
(for [livejournal.com profile] moizissimo, who wondered why a cake would contain exactly seven servings)

Once upon a time there were seven hungry fairies who hated continued fractions and infinite series. It was their birthday (for all fairies have the same birthday), and they all wanted cake.

Mickey O'Flaherty, the neighbourhood drunken leprechaun, took a perfectly sharp knife -- one which left no kerf at all -- and sliced the perfectly cubical cake cleanly in two: once vertically from the north, once vertically from the east, once horizontally from the south. There were now eight pieces for seven fairies, so he placed one piece of cake on each plate and started to hand them out.

"Hey!" shouted the fairies. "You're just a drunken leprechaun! You don't get any cake; it's our birthday!"

So Mickey O'Flaherty took the last piece of cake, itself a perfect cube, and with his perfectly sharp knife sliced it cleanly in two: once vertically from the north, once vertically from the east, once horizontally from the south. There were now eight smaller pieces for seven fairies, so he placed one piece of cake on each plate, balancing it carefully atop the first piece, and started to hand them out.

"Hey!" shouted the fairies. "You're just a drunken leprechaun! You don't get any cake; it's our birthday!"

So Mickey O'Flaherty took the last piece of cake, itself a perfect cube, and hesitated a moment with his perfectly sharp knife in hand. "You know, we could just keep doing this forever, because there'll always be a piece left over."

"No!" screamed the fairies. "Not a continued fraction! We hate infinite series!"

"But don't you find it fascinating that Σ(1/8)i is equal to one seventh?"

"No!" screamed the fairies. "Not an infinite series! We hate continued fractions!"

"But don't you find it beautiful to imagine infinitely many cubes, each exactly one eighth the size of the last, stacked one on top of the other on your plates?"

"No!" screamed the fairies, and magicked Mickey O'Flaherty's perfectly sharp knife out of his hand. With their collective will, they easily sliced the last piece of cake six times -- snick, snack, sneak, snuck, snook, snick -- into seven parallel slabs of perfectly equal sevenths. And Mickey O'Flaherty took another swig of whiskey and grumbled off, belching, into the ferns.
osmie: (Default)
(for [livejournal.com profile] moizissimo, who wondered why a cake would contain exactly seven servings)

Once upon a time there were seven hungry fairies who hated continued fractions and infinite series. It was their birthday (for all fairies have the same birthday), and they all wanted cake.

Mickey O'Flaherty, the neighbourhood drunken leprechaun, took a perfectly sharp knife -- one which left no kerf at all -- and sliced the perfectly cubical cake cleanly in two: once vertically from the north, once vertically from the east, once horizontally from the south. There were now eight pieces for seven fairies, so he placed one piece of cake on each plate and started to hand them out.

"Hey!" shouted the fairies. "You're just a drunken leprechaun! You don't get any cake; it's our birthday!"

So Mickey O'Flaherty took the last piece of cake, itself a perfect cube, and with his perfectly sharp knife sliced it cleanly in two: once vertically from the north, once vertically from the east, once horizontally from the south. There were now eight smaller pieces for seven fairies, so he placed one piece of cake on each plate, balancing it carefully atop the first piece, and started to hand them out.

"Hey!" shouted the fairies. "You're just a drunken leprechaun! You don't get any cake; it's our birthday!"

So Mickey O'Flaherty took the last piece of cake, itself a perfect cube, and hesitated a moment with his perfectly sharp knife in hand. "You know, we could just keep doing this forever, because there'll always be a piece left over."

"No!" screamed the fairies. "Not a continued fraction! We hate infinite series!"

"But don't you find it fascinating that Σ(1/8)i is equal to one seventh?"

"No!" screamed the fairies. "Not an infinite series! We hate continued fractions!"

"But don't you find it beautiful to imagine infinitely many cubes, each exactly one eighth the size of the last, stacked one on top of the other on your plates?"

"No!" screamed the fairies, and magicked Mickey O'Flaherty's perfectly sharp knife out of his hand. With their collective will, they easily sliced the last piece of cake six times -- snick, snack, sneak, snuck, snook, snick -- into seven parallel slabs of perfectly equal sevenths. And Mickey O'Flaherty took another swig of whiskey and grumbled off, belching, into the ferns.
osmie: (Default)
A few weeks ago, [livejournal.com profile] surlyben put out a call for 75-word comic scripts, preferably ultraviolent and containing more sound effects than dialogue, to be assembled into an epic tale called Shot to Death.

So of course I submitted one, because ultraviolent comic book scripts are what I do best1. And now he's started illustrating it!



1Along with ballet dance, shipbuilding, and zero-gee mine disposal.
osmie: (Default)
A few weeks ago, [livejournal.com profile] surlyben put out a call for 75-word comic scripts, preferably ultraviolent and containing more sound effects than dialogue, to be assembled into an epic tale called Shot to Death.

So of course I submitted one, because ultraviolent comic book scripts are what I do best1. And now he's started illustrating it!



1Along with ballet dance, shipbuilding, and zero-gee mine disposal.

Profile

osmie: (Default)
Osmium Penguin

April 2016

S M T W T F S
     12
345678 9
10 111213141516
171819202122 23
2425262728 2930

Syndicate

RSS Atom

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags